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Nuthn hurt at tht moment. it all went smoothly. both of us said bye to tht already disintegrating situation. numbness had settled in a long tym back. i thot it wudnt hurt. it didnt! we parted, not gracefully, but we did part... i dunno where to go frm here. mebbe i was never good enuf. mebbe i wus jus too available. ppl tend to be lyk tht. how was i supposed to knw this happens in friendships too? how the fuck was i supposed to know????numbness steeled in deeper.was i in lacking somewhere? i cudnt complain.
Nuthn hurt at tht moment. it all went smoothly. both of us said bye to tht already disintegrating situation. numbness had settled in a long tym back. i thot it wudnt hurt. it didnt! we parted, not gracefully, but we did part... i dunno where to go frm here. mebbe i was never good enuf. mebbe i wus jus too available. ppl tend to be lyk tht. how was i supposed to knw this happens in friendships too? how the fuck was i supposed to know????numbness steeled in deeper.was i in lacking somewhere? i cudnt complain.
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We had gone different ways. then numbness lost. heart ache returned.my scraps buks n inbox kept filling with evrithing other than her scraps and sms. my lyf went on without her reminders. i started handling my situations without her.i went to the university. i continued my studies. i went on. i didnt call her up.i changed. something inside me changed. the hurt and the pain changed it. a cuple of my friends are in constant contact with her. this is bad enuf. something has happened to me. i dont know wat. ive turned cold... frosty mebbe. emotions dont effect me now. i see people cry infront of me. i just turn away. my sympathies are not there for them any more. i dont have many pictures on my wall now.
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i dont believe in friendship anymore. i dont believe somebdy cud love me for who i am. besides, i dont even remember my original skin. huh. and i dont blame all of that on one person only. on her only. no. how can he be responsible for all of this? lol. its me. i know. the fact i dont miss her anymore scares me. but i dont. but yes, it feels as if a chunk of my heart is cut off. its hurts constantly. that slow hurt. where you dont recognise the pain. but u identify wid it.he cudnt find any magic in my words anymore. my mistake was i stopped believing in them too. that's wen evrything flew away with the faith. i know sumbdy today who's ready to be by my side for the rest of my life. i dont believe her. i start joking wen he turns serious. isnt this wat lyf is? a big ugly joke?
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Courtesy:Aruj
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Courtesy:Aruj
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