Walking Away..

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Nuthn hurt at tht moment. it all went smoothly. both of us said bye to tht already disintegrating situation. numbness had settled in a long tym back. i thot it wudnt hurt. it didnt! we parted, not gracefully, but we did part... i dunno where to go frm here. mebbe i was never good enuf. mebbe i wus jus too available. ppl tend to be lyk tht. how was i supposed to knw this happens in friendships too? how the fuck was i supposed to know????numbness steeled in deeper.was i in lacking somewhere? i cudnt complain.

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We had gone different ways. then numbness lost. heart ache returned.my scraps buks n inbox kept filling with evrithing other than her scraps and sms. my lyf went on without her reminders. i started handling my situations without her.i went to the university. i continued my studies. i went on. i didnt call her up.i changed. something inside me changed. the hurt and the pain changed it. a cuple of my friends are in constant contact with her. this is bad enuf. something has happened to me. i dont know wat. ive turned cold... frosty mebbe. emotions dont effect me now. i see people cry infront of me. i just turn away. my sympathies are not there for them any more. i dont have many pictures on my wall now.

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i dont believe in friendship anymore. i dont believe somebdy cud love me for who i am. besides, i dont even remember my original skin. huh. and i dont blame all of that on one person only. on her only. no. how can he be responsible for all of this? lol. its me. i know. the fact i dont miss her anymore scares me. but i dont. but yes, it feels as if a chunk of my heart is cut off. its hurts constantly. that slow hurt. where you dont recognise the pain. but u identify wid it.he cudnt find any magic in my words anymore. my mistake was i stopped believing in them too. that's wen evrything flew away with the faith. i know sumbdy today who's ready to be by my side for the rest of my life. i dont believe her. i start joking wen he turns serious. isnt this wat lyf is? a big ugly joke?
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Courtesy:Aruj

Friends Forever

Funny how friends say forever,
people never seem to stay together

You told me not to worry, told me not to cry,
you said we were best friends, it was a lie.

I'm here still pretending not to care,
pretending I don't notice you're never there.

You hurt me so bad you will never know,
and the pain I keep inside I will never show.

You'd probably see it if you just tried,
and know how many nights I have cried.

But don't worry I'll be fine,
I'm not the one who left all my friends behind.

-Unknown-